My friend Shelley showed me the trick to ordering dim sum. You have to hunt down the cart with the food you want and then just grab that sucker and haul it back to your table like one of those fishes that people catch by hand. This was especially useful last weekend where it was ass to jowel in our restaurant because of the Chinatown Lunar New Year Parade. It was the same way on the streets. I made eye contact with a guy on a float who was tossing tubes that shoot out confetti, but a girl with Richard Sherman skills stole the tube out of my hand before I could secure it. The going rate for those tubes is $3 by the way, which I know because I had to buy mine. Who wants to fire it off with me?